Ditch the Meister - the nation's new favourite pasttime (along with spitting, cutting trees and digging roads)

It all started with ....well who else....that notorious seducer of boudis, that self-delusioned reincarnation of Don Juan and Casanova, the man single-handedly responsible for keeping the hair-gel industry afloat - the Great Indian Chunkuubaaz. After promising the Meister that he would be staying in Hyderabad for at least another 2-3 years, he ran away. He just could not resist the call of the boudi (reminds the Meister of them frustrated randy Greek sailors in Odyssey and them German sailors in myths and them Sirens) and lunked off leaving the Meister high and dry!!! And this after 10 years of close friendship :-(

Well as a matter of fact, the first one to ditch the Meister was his closest friend in college - all over a girl!!! Meister had a mini-crush on a girl, nothing serious, just a crush, the son of a porcupine fell in love with the same girl. He felt threatened by the Meister as the girl used to hang around the Meister because the Meister was that damn good in English. So in order to win the girl, the dynamic dumdum started to spread rumours and malign the Meister's character in public. The funny thing (well funny now not then) was that the Meister had no clue and if only the numbskull had come and told him all, Meister would have actually helped him in his wooing process. See the Meister has no problems if someone invokes his name and paints his character as heinous and akin to Idi Amin, Pol Pot, cultural studies students etc. All he asks is that the person should tell the Meister what he/she is doing.

Anyway, to go back to the ditching part. Sir Gaysalot proudly upheld the tradition by ditching the Meister twice in the same trip - once in Bhubaneshwar and then in the motherland. The official reason was sickness, the unofficial reason- extreme boredom. He had ditched the Meister once before also - he had stopped talking coz he was apparently disillusioned with the Meister!!!

Then it was he turn of our very own present day slave owner - The Pampered Princess. She ditched the Meister because she started missing slaves as he refused to wait hand over foot on her. The final straw was when the Meister ignored her orders to go fetch water and she had to walk all of 15 metres to get it - how horrible!!!

The most recent boarders of the Ditch Meister bandwagon are his 2 friends SS and MS. They ditched the Meister after making plans to go see Public Enemies. Despite being mule tired after working all weekend and a bloody good downpour, Meister went to the theatre and got the tickets only to get the news that neither of the 2 would be able to make it coz of work :-( :-( (granted that's a good excuse but disappointing nonetheless)

Suffice to say thzt the Meister is a bit jittery nowadays...the rumour is that he is looking over his shoulders all the while keeping a lookout on the sides and in front as well (its bloody difficult)...the last thing he wants to do now is to fall into a ditch.